SPIDERBABE

Produced by John Bacchus
Directed and Edited by Johnny Crash
Written by Terry West and John P. Fedele
Director of Photography - Tony Morales

Patricia Porker - Misty Mundae
Lucinda/Femtilian - Julian Wells
Lisa - Darian Caine
Mark - Adam Cox
Aunt Maybe - Bubbles VaVoom

New Yorkers are a jaded bunch. You can get mugged or raped in a back alley during broad daylight without so much as a second glance. Or so the cliche goes. I have my doubts as to the extent of New Yorker cynicism, but the point remains apparent - nothing surprises New Yorkers.

Maybe that was true until the guys at Seduction Cinema decided to stuff Misty Mundae into a fishnet manga-inspired spider-gal suit and have her run around Broadway weaving through an unsuspecting crowd and jumping over trash cans. Director Johnny Crash left in all the double takes from perplexed pedestrians who unexpectedly had Seduction's newest franchise thrust upon them. Whether those bystanders wore expressions of shock, amusement, or utter disbelief, one thing was apparent, at that moment they had in fact seen it all.

Like Stan Lee's comic creation, Spider-Man, SPIDERBABE is very much a New York property. From the personalities down to the locations, this movie breathes New York. Crash, a good-natured cat from across the pond in Limey Land, stamps his movie with as much New York color as he can into the brisk 80 minute running time. His cameraman, Tony Morales, stops and lingers on the localities and people giving viewers a chance to soak in flavor. And what enjoyable flavor it is.

I can honestly say without reservation that this is by far my favorite Seduction Cinema release. Never have I laughed so loud or so hard at one of their titles. The script from Terry West and the always hysterical John Fedele possesses moments that far exceed what I've come to expect in the way of Seduction humor. SpiderBabe's organic webshooter caught me so completely off guard that I had to rewind just to make sure I hadn't drifted off and daydreamed. The running gag of that webshooter makes for some of the movie's best moments. A scene with SpiderBabe gives a bully his comeuppance while she sits casually in the park hits high marks for its tastelessly silly humor.

Above all else, this is Misty Mundae's movie. She's never been more relaxed and at home then she appears here as Patricia Porker, a goddess in geek's clothing. The pigtails and glasses do little to hide Mundae's natural beauty - it's the mannerism and facial tics that scream the universal language of nerdism and ultimately sell the part. Mundae's come a long way since her days in the Factory 2000 camp, and she's well on her way to becoming a natural comedienne.

Some Seduction Cinema fans have harshly criticized the movie for it's lack of sapho sexual situations. And that's understandable. The Seduction Cinema hallmark is lesbian sex...and lots of it. But SPIDERBABE is a comedy first and sex farce second. Rather than force the sex upon the plot, Crash, West, and Fedele work it naturally into the story playing off SpiderBabe's chemically enhanced libido. Even in the unrated version, which is what I screened, the sex is far and few between. The moments when the sex finally does take center stage become purer and more enjoyable, and that's coming from a guy who's become so jaded in his viewing that he usually rides the fastforward during the Seduction money shots.

Perhaps the perfect Seduction Cinema release, SPIDERBABE takes the standard Seduction notion of feminine empowerment and leaps tall buildings. There isn't a weak female character in the movie, which is a hallmark of Seduction titles, but this time around they are all independent and strong-willed, and not merely lesbian fodder.

While I only screened the unrated version, the jam-packed 2 disc special edition contains both versions of the movie with a separate set of features on each disc. Disc 1 contains the R-rated movie, interviews with the cast, a Punishment music video featuring Misty, outtakes, bloopers, a photo gallery, and a large trailer vault. Disc 2 contains the unrated feature, a special SpiderBabe short for a British program titled "Out There," deleted scenes, and "making of" featurettes detailing fx and the SpiderBabe costume. I've gotten used to Seduction Cinema's limited edition soundtrack and movie dvd sets and found myself lamenting the omission of a musical cd this time around as SPIDERBABE features some of the best music Seduction has supplied to date, but this is easily forgiven considering how much material has been crammed onto the discs.

Johnny Crash should be proud - as far as I'm concerned the man has produced the crowning jewel in Seduction Cinema's sappho-ladden tiara. It's fun, sexy, and absolutely enjoyable.

Seduction Cinema