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VAMPIRE BLUES
Produced by Kevin Collins and Peter Jevanko
Written and Directed by Jess Franco
Edited by Juan Jose Villar
Director of Photography - Raquel CabraRachel Sheppard
Lina RomayI take it back, BLIND TARGET isn't the worst Jess Franco movie I've ever seen, this one takes the crown and defecates all over it. Movies like VAMPIRE BLUES set the legitimacy of shot-on-video cinema back a good 20 years. Since the man isn't going to care about making a quality movie, I'm not going to care about writing a quality review. From here on out, I'm doing everything Franco style, half-assed and full of shit.
For what it's worth, I wish I knew who gives Franco the money to keep making these movies. I'm sure I could swindle a few grand out of them as well. Something like VAMPIRE BLUES don't deserved to be called a movie. It's porn without the porn, and it makes the works of Seduction Cinema look like lost Orson Wells classics. VAMPIRE BLUES is a total and complete failure on all levels.
I have no idea what was going on in this flick. There's no real plot to speak of, just psychedelic shots of shaved and need-to-be-shaved vaginas. During the climactic orgy there's some nonsense where Franco uses a video effect to turn all the blacks to a blown-out red. The effects blow out all the smut the prospective buyers might be into. I can't think of any other reason why even a die hard Franco would spend money on this other than the porn.
What makes matters worse is that their are two different versions of the movie on the DVD, an edited cut and an "uncut European" version. Why the edited is even included is beyond me, the nearest I can tell is that it removes some of the sex and one or two entire scenes, but I'm not about to go back and do a scene-by-scene comparison. It's not like this baby will ever make it to television or cable, the programs value their audience, which is something I'm not sure Franco does.
The disc is short on features. Just the two movies, a music video, and a stills gallery.